Charging Ahead vs. Self-Care: Navigating Conflicting Emotions After Career Loss
From the Editor’s Desk: A Temporary Detour
Beyond the Flight Deck typically focuses on exploring different career paths in aviation and exponentially increasing the number of women in aviation and aerospace. However, for right now we’re taking a short detour from our usual content. As some of you may know, my company recently ceased business operations, leaving me to navigate the challenging emotions that come with such a significant career setback.
I know that there are many others out there who are experiencing similar feelings every single day—whether it’s due to job loss, career transitions, or other challenges. I believe that by sharing how I’m feeling and what I’m doing to move forward, I can help others who might be going through the same thing.
While these editions are more personal, I want you to know that we’ll return to the regular purpose of the newsletter shortly. In the meantime, I hope that my story resonates with you and offers some comfort or guidance as you navigate your own journey.
Thank you for your continued support, and I look forward to getting back to our shared mission of advancing careers in aviation and aerospace.
Charging Ahead vs. Self-Care: Navigating Conflicting Emotions After Career Loss
In my previous edition of Beyond the Flight Deck, I shared my journey through the stages of grief after unexpectedly finding myself unemployed. It’s been a process of reflection, acceptance, and determination to move forward. But as the days pass, I’m finding that navigating this new reality isn’t as simple as just putting one foot in front of the other. There’s a conflict within me—a push and pull between the drive to charge ahead into the next chapter of my career and the need to take time for self-care.
The Battle Between Action and Rest
Every day, I wake up with the knowledge that I need to move forward. The sense of urgency to find the next opportunity, to rebuild, and to continue my journey is powerful. Some days, that drive takes over, and I march straight upstairs to my home office, ready to tackle whatever is on my to-do list. I tell myself that this is what I need to do—stay productive, stay focused, and keep moving.
But then there are other days. Days when the weight of what I’ve been through feels overwhelming. On those days, the thought of staying home, of sitting in the silence, is too much. I know that if I stay, I’ll be tempted to retreat to my bed, to pull the covers over my head and shut out the world. So I grab my keys, head to a coffee shop, and force myself to be around people, to find some semblance of normalcy in the noise and bustle.
These conflicting emotions—charging ahead versus taking time to heal—leave me questioning: What is the right thing to do? Should I be pushing myself to move forward, or should I be giving myself the grace to step back and care for my mental and emotional well-being?
Understanding the Need for Balance
The truth is, there is no “correct” answer. Both action and rest are necessary parts of healing and moving forward. The key is finding a balance between the two, recognizing when to push ahead and when to allow yourself the space to pause and breathe.
On the Days I Charge Ahead: These are the days when I feel a sense of control, when the drive to take action gives me purpose and direction. On these days, I focus on rebuilding—whether it’s updating my resume, networking, or exploring new opportunities. There’s a sense of empowerment in taking charge, in knowing that I’m doing everything I can to create my future.
On the Days I Need to Retreat: These are the days when self-care becomes paramount. I’ve learned that it’s okay to step back, to acknowledge that I’m not a machine, and that I need time to process what I’ve been through. Whether it’s spending time in a coffee shop to change my environment or simply allowing myself a day to rest, these moments of retreat are not a sign of weakness—they’re a recognition of my humanity.
How Am I Different This Time?
This isn’t the first time I’ve found myself in this situation. But I’ve noticed that I’m handling it differently now. The last time I faced a similar career setback, I felt an almost relentless need to push forward, to prove that I could bounce back quickly. I was harder on myself, less willing to acknowledge the emotional toll of what I had experienced.
This time, I’m giving myself more grace. I’m learning to listen to my body and mind, to recognize when I need to push and when I need to pause. I’m more aware of the importance of self-care, of the need to heal emotionally as well as professionally. I’ve come to understand that resilience isn’t just about charging ahead; it’s also about knowing when to step back and care for yourself.
I’m also more comfortable with the idea that healing takes time. I don’t have to have all the answers right now. It’s okay to take things one day at a time, to allow myself to feel the full range of emotions that come with this experience. I’m learning that true resilience is about adapting to the situation, finding the strength to move forward while also respecting the need to heal.
What Is the Right Thing to Do?
So, what is the right thing to do? The answer, I believe, is to listen to yourself. Some days, the right thing will be to charge ahead, to take action and feel the empowerment that comes with it. On other days, the right thing will be to step back, to rest, and to care for your emotional and mental well-being.
There’s no one-size-fits-all answer, and that’s okay. The journey through career loss is deeply personal, and it’s different for everyone. What matters most is that you honor where you are, that you recognize the value in both action and rest, and that you give yourself permission to do what you need to do in the moment.
As I continue to navigate this journey, I’m learning that resilience is about more than just pushing forward. It’s about finding balance, about being kind to yourself, and about understanding that it’s okay to take things one day at a time. Some days will be about action, others will be about rest, and both are equally important.
Conclusion: Embracing the Journey
If you find yourself in a similar situation—torn between the need to move forward and the need to take care of yourself—know that you’re not alone. It’s a journey that requires patience, self-awareness, and a willingness to listen to your own needs.
There’s no rush to have it all figured out. What’s important is that you keep moving forward, even if that means taking a step back sometimes. By embracing both the drive to push ahead and the need for self-care, you’ll find your way through this journey, stronger and more resilient than ever.
Should you want support in navigating whatever challenge that you currently find yourself in, please do not hesitate to reach out to me at dana@danakirchmar. com or schedule 20 minutes on my calendar for a short conversation - see link in comments.
Until we soar again,
Dana